Cover photo for Elaine Marie Selfridge's Obituary
1965 Elaine Marie Selfridge 2025

Elaine Marie Selfridge

October 21, 1965 — January 1, 2025

Elaine Marie Kostic Selfridge, 59, of Dillwyn, Virginia, passed away Wednesday, January 1, 2025. She was the loving wife of Edward Cameron Selfridge, and the devoted mother of Mallory Edwards, the late Harrison Edwards, Andrew Selfridge, James Selfridge, and Catherine Selfridge. 

Elaine was born on October 21, 1965 to the late Michael Kostic and Sharon Bonestele Hoerst. Elaine was nicknamed Pookie as an infant because her inquisitive and unblinking stares reminded her parents of the lion puppet on the Soupy Sales Show; a name that stuck with her family and childhood friends throughout her life. She grew up in Willingboro, New Jersey, and loved to regale her husband and kids with stories of her younger days. She was blessed to attend her 40th high school reunion in October, 2024 where she reconnected in person with several of her longtime friends. 

Elaine was a professional technical writer and editor, but was better known for her skills as an award-winning crafter and cook. She could work magic by turning long pieces of yarn into beautiful sweaters, shawls, blankets, hats, and gloves. Her handcrafted crocheted animals found homes all across the country, and she won a blue and red ribbon at the 2023 Virginia State Fair for her knitted blankets. 

Food was her love language, and Elaine's culinary skills were on display at her parties, holiday gatherings, and (for those of us lucky enough to share a home with her), on her kitchen table on a regular basis. After moving to a small farm in Buckingham County in 2012, Elaine challenged herself to learn to cook all of the dishes she couldn't find in local restaurants. You never knew what you might find on her table, but you knew it was going to be one of the best meals you've ever had.

Elaine could be profane and profound, witty and wise, snarky and sweet. She was a force of nature, a larger-than-life figure who influenced, inspired, and impacted hundreds of lives during her time on Earth. She was never comfortable with attention, but she gamely participated in podcasts with her husband; sharing their adventures of moving from the suburbs to the small farm they called home, sharing recipes and crafting tips, and providing listeners and followers on social media with intimate updates on her fight against cancer. More than anything, though, Elaine loved spending time with her family, and her children were her greatest joy. 

Elaine embraced life to the fullest and was never shy about trying new experiences. From bodybuilding to bellydancing, if something interested Elaine she'd dive right in, and more often than not she displayed an innate talent. She never stopped creating or learning. At the time of her death, she had just finished knitting a baby blanket for a friend's newborn and was reading a book on her Kindle that she'd checked out of the library the day before. 

The family will hold a Celebration of Elaine’s Life at a later date in the spring. We can also celebrate and honor when we live by her example; creating something new, caring for others, and pushing ourselves to be more than we were the day before. 

In lieu of flowers please consider making memorial contributions to the American Lung Association, or you can help the family at givesendgo.com/miss-e. 

Tharp Funeral Home & Crematory, Lynchburg, is assisting the family.

To order memorial trees or send flowers to the family in memory of Elaine Marie Selfridge, please visit our flower store.

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